Ghosts and Grunts

Extraorrrrrrrdinary tales of the undead

Many years ago, when I was in primary school, there was a book in the school library that caused a bit of a stir. It was a collection of (allegedly) true Australian ghost stories.

I can’t recall much about the contents. It probably included all the usual suspects such as Frederici at the Princess Theatre and Fisher’s ghost. But there was one chapter that started up a whole load of trouble – one about a bunch of quite terrifying events alleged to have occurred to a bunch of kids on a school camp at the Old York Hospital.

This caused quite a ruckuss. It was all anyone would talk about. In creative writing class, all anyone would write were stories about ghosts and (for some reason) ninjas and kung-fu on school camping trips to the Old York Hospital. The situation got so bad that the year seven school camp was cancelled out of fear that the students would run off to go ghost hunting (or possibly ninja hunting). The fact that it was a fairly conservative Catholic primary school with a dim view of all things “occult” probably didn’t help matters either – I think the book eventually vanished from the shelves never to be seen again before the whole thing eventually died down.

It did however leave me with a lifelong curiosity about the old hospital, and when a photographer on Flickr got in touch with me this week about the old Castle Fun Park in Mandurah, and I noticed some photos of the hospital in her photostream, I decided to do some research about the story I remembered as a kid. And I found the motherload!

First up I located a lengthy article about the events at the old hospital by one Miriam Howard-Wright. The article was published in a magazine, but I strongly suspect that the book that caused such a stir so many years ago was written by her, with the article reworked into the notorious York chapter.

I also found a fantastic old documentary about Australian hauntings up on YouTube. Broadcast in the 1980s it very likely sparked the Old-York-Hospital mania I remember so well. The video transfer is a bit off, and it’s heavily infused with a rather 1970s “the paranormal is now a serious subject of scientific enquiry” vibe, but it’s still a damn good watch. One of the most entertaining aspects of it is actually the accents – the narrator appears to be English (presumably on the basis that no one could possibly take a documentary narrated by an Australian seriously) and there are a couple of examples of the old “refined” Australian accent which is now nearing extinction (such as the woman at the info centre in the Rocks). The sheer preponderance of cigarettes also shows how much the country’s changed in the last 30 years.

Finally I stumbled over another documentary, this one from 2001, about Australia’s “Most Haunted Town” (apparently Kapunda). It’s hosted by Warrick Moss, who made his mark in the field by hosting 90s paranormal infotainment classic The Extraorrrrdinary (you have to say it like that – it’s the way he did it). It’s nothing particularly ground-breaking, but gets my vote for the second half, which consists almost wholly of shaky-cam, infra-red footage of Moss stumbling around in the dark, grunting (and swearing). Now that’s entertainment!

One of these days I’ll make it to York…

The Lancaster Soup!

Chinballs!

Call me a Heretic if you like, but as far as I’m concerned the correct lyrics are…

Mmmm-mmmm-mmmm-mmmm,
Feed the foam,
Environment,
At Royco, Cup-a-Soup,

You’re acting fifteen!
Touching yourself, repent!
At Royco, Cup-a-Soup!

OOOOOOOOOOOHHH!
The Lancaster Soup!
Soup in a cup!
God is Royco, Cup-a-Sooooooooop!!!!!!

In government the liquor’s the same,

And that’s all I’ve got to say about that!

Weather Balloons and Other Statistical Anomalies

On the face of available evidence…

Here at the office we are still to actually meet new girl.

She’s sending us designs, so she must exist in some form, but there’s been neither hide nor hair of her around the place.

My leading theory is that she’s actually a cutting edge artificially-intelligent design program. My co-worker Bruce claims to have actually met her, but I feel that this encounter can safely be written off as a weather balloon or similar statistical anomaly.

Together in Electric Dreams

Smart, but weird.

Man buys a computer to design a new kind of brick. Man spills champagne on the computer. The computer becomes sentient and goes all Fatal Attraction on him…

Yes, I’m talking about the movie Electric Dreams. It’s pretty stupid, but back in the first, early dawn of personal computing anything seemed possible. And as divorced from reality as the film may have been, it at least gave us this scene, which is one of the best classical/Eighties-electronic-pop mashups ever recorded.

(My new monitor is teh awesomes by the way)

I Has a Monitor!

48 hours without the net. How did I manage it?

My new 24 inch LED monitor has been courier delivered to the office. Assuming that nothing goes wrong between now and when I get home, I am back in the 21st century! Hooray!

I also picked up some new speakers to replace the rather old and decrepit ones that have served my last three computers. Nothing special, but they do have a rather frightening looking sub-woofer. Not sure where I’ll put it.

Ah! Technological bliss!

On that subject I’m thinking of formatting my Asus Eee and installing Linux on it before I head off on my cruise in the new year.Β  It’s not powerful enough to handle Windows 7 in any useful way, and I don’t like the idea of wandering around parts foreign running XP. I’ll only be using it to write, to store photos and to access the net when nothing with a bigger screen is available, so Linux should serve all my needs admirably. I’ll need to do some research…

Forciable Detox

My monitor has forsaken me!

Well, my home computer’s monitor has finally crapped out on me.

It’s been dying for a while. The power button hasn’t worked for about six months, and for the last few months it’s been refusing to wake up once it goes into sleep mode. I’ve been dealing with both problems by rigging up a monitor extension lead so I can directly cut and restore power without getting out of my chair, which has been serving to wake it up again. But yesterday morning nothing I did could get an image to appear. Dang.

Apparently the thing that most often goes bye-bye on Viewsonic monitors is the capacitors. These can be replaced, but unless you’re willing to do the work yourself the cost for parts and labour is generally about that of an entirely new monitor. So I guess I have some shopping to do.

On the plus side, this enforced break from using my home computer (I don’t have a spare monitor, so I can’t do squat) will serve as a nice detox from Fallout: New Vegas, which I’ve recently got back into and have been playing way too much. I’m getting seriously tetris-affected – I saw an agave plant in a garden over the weekend and had a sudden urge to harvest it. Not good. Not good at all πŸ™‚

(As long as I don’t start seeing people’s body parts highlighted I should be OK though :))

Over and out.

Her Mother Teresa Young Humanitarian of the Year Award

It’s even funnier with an Irish accent.

I’ve really been enjoying Misfits lately.

For those not in the know, it’s British series about a bunch of young offenders on community service who get caught in a mysterious lightning storm and develop super-powers. If this were an American series they’d immediately start solving crimes, fighting terrorists and defending Freedom, but this is a British series, so they immediately start f’ing everything up and rather dark hilarity ensues.

I actually heard about the series a few years back and thought it sounded like something worth checking out. Then I didn’t. But then I stumbled onto the premiere of the second season about a month ago, and have been enjoying it ever since.

I won’t post any real spoilers, but will include an example of dialogue (from the most recent episode aired here) as an example of the general tone…

It was an accident! She was rubbing my cock and and then she starts foaming at the mouth and then she tripped and impaled herself on her Mother Teresa Young Humanitarian of the Year Award!

Yeah, Nathan gets all the best lines πŸ™‚

Oh hey, here’s the trailer.

Friday nights on ABC people! Be there or be a rectangular thing!

Da Guv’na

They see him rollin’, they hatin’

Was crossing the road outside the office today when a most curious vehicle went past. It had a miniature West Australian flag flying from the bonnet, and the number plates were polished silver (well, probably aluminium) with big, chunky, 3D silver crowns in the middle.

A small amount of research later it appears that it was the car of His Excellency Mr Malcolm McCusker AO QC, 33rd Governor of Western Australia.

I don’t think he was actually in said vehicle as I only saw a driver and no passengers and I don’t imagine the Governor drives himself. I suppose he could have been ducking down in the back, but it does seem unlikely.

So that’s my excitement for the week!

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