Musical Snobbery

The Shade

While I love Metric’s take on it, it’s pretty clear that The Shade is a Chvrches song that got assigned to them by some kind of cosmic mix up…

Music Break

Just a few tracks that have caught my attention of late.

The album version of Shiny Toy Guns’ Don’t Cry Out. The male vocalist is nasal, the female vocalist is basically just screeching, and the bells are out of tune, BUT IT ALL WORKS SO WELL!!!

This “Parallel Universe” mix of Kate Bush’s Running Up that Hill/A Deal with God by Matt One. Adding vocals from Placebo’s version works incredibly well and slipping in the guitar solo from Another Brick in The Wall is a masterstroke!

Going really far back for a couple of 80s tracks that totally passed me by at the time. The Great Commandment by Camouflage and the odd but compelling Screaming Jets by Johnny Warman, which I presume is where the 90s rock band got its name from.

And finally perhaps the most ludicrously happy piece of music ever recorded -, the theme song from the 1988 Crystal Light United States National Aerobic Championships. The fact that such a contest existed, that it was televised, that the opening is such unadulterated, unintentional camp, AND that they came up with such a banger of a tune for it is so incredible that I am simply lost for words. And on top of that, the singer – Ty Parr – went on to be a regular bit player on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, which is just baffling in a truly wonderful way.

That’s it. Go find your own entertainment!

Hottest 100 2025

Since it’s Hottest 100 day I suppose I’d better post what I actually voted for. In no particular order…

Disco Cowgirl – G Flip (23)

The bridge with the “Ohhh-ohhh” bits in the back followed by the drum breakdown followed by going a cappella with a key jump is pop music manipulation 101, BUT IT WORKS SO GODDAMN WELL THAT I DON’T CARE! Party song of the year!

Sue Me – Audrey Hobert

That over processed drum sound (A hi-hat maybe? Whatever the Fine Young Cannibals did on She Drives Me Crazy anyway…) grabbed me the first time I head it and then the wonky synth cut in and I was gone.

Bawuypawuy – Drifting Clouds

So goddam smooth! Probably the best song of the year! (That sax could come straight off of Floodland)

The Winner Takes it All – Carla Wehbe

It’s good form to include at least one Like a Version in your votes, and Carla knocked it out of the park with this one.

Divine Feelings – Vance Joy (75)

This didn’t impress me much the first time I heard it, but it crept into my brain and I wasn’t able to shake it (probably the ‘dodododo-dodo do-do do-do’ bits). First of my votes to make it in at 75!

Lovesick Lullaby – YUNGBLUD

Complaining about stuff in a regional English accent and then doing a bit of singing in the chorus worked for Mike Skinner, and works just as well for YUNGBLUD

King Baby – Frank and Louis

Channeling the Smiths for a slap down of the orange menace. What’s not to like?

Keith – Playlunch (4!?)

You have to include at least one novelty track in your votes, right? And you can’t live in Australian suburbia without knowing at least one Keith.

Shy Girl – Haute & Freddy

Stumbled over this on YouTube and have been listening ever since. I suspect that no one at JJJ have ever heard of them. Retro 80s in the best possible way!

Lachryma – Ghost

They don’t play Ghost on JJJ, but I’ll keep voting for them until they do, damnit!

Songs that almost made it into my votes include…

Where is my Husband? – RAYE (5)
Please Don’t Move To Melbourne – Ball Park Music (10)
Sally, When The Wine Runs Out – ROLE MODEL (13)
Basic Being Basic – Djo (30)
I’m On Fire – Keli Holiday (41)
Balcony – Teen Jesus and the Jean Teasers (61)
Take on Me – The Dreggs (70)
It’s Raining Men – Playlunch (73)
Bed on Fire – G Flip (74)
Leave Me Alone – Reneé Rapp (77)
Everybody Scream – Florence + The Machine (78)
Miss Erotica – Peach PRC (82)
Lover Girl – Laufey (92)

Skeletons 2026

Said the Ukraine Skeleton “Help us to stay free!”
Said the USA Skeleton “What’s in it for me?”
Said the RFK Skeleton “Throw vaccines in the bin”
Said the Measles Outbreak Skeleton “Polka-dots are in!”
Said the Social Media Skeleton “With lies I will regale ya”
Said the Oil Industry Skeleton “Let’s annex Venezuela”
Said the Manifest Destiny Skeleton “Greenland’s looking nice”
Said the Minnesota Skeleton “There’s already too much ICE!”
Said the AI Skeleton “There’s no need to think!”
Said the Tech Bro Skeleton “Our AIs need to drink!”
Said the Elon Musk Skeleton “The white race must prevail!”
Said the MAGA Skeleton “Sieg Heil! Sieg Heil!”

Blackstar

For ten years we’ve been on our own,
And vacant is the Goblin Throne,
But that’s not how it used to be,
When Ziggy sang his Martian song,
In a coat he passed to Major Tom,
And a voice he gave to you and me…

I honestly can’t believe it’s been ten years.

This remains my favourite tribute. I always notice the little girl in the red coat. She almost certainly had no idea who David Bowie was, she just found herself surrounded by magical music and started dancing.

Ten years gone. Thanks David.

Stumbling Into Greatness

Randomly remembering one of the most successful mistakes I ever made.

Back in the early 90s I heard an unfamiliar – but awesome – song on RTR FM’s letter request program Steregoround. I didn’t know who it was by, but guessed the name based on the lyrics, and included a request to play it again in my weekly correspondence. This got read out as follows…

Host 1: …please play The Mercy Seed by whoever sings it…

All Three hosts: NICK CAVE AND THE BAD SEATS!! *dissolve into prolonged laughter*

Host 1: That’s really clever!

Host 2: Either that or this person is a fucking idiot…

I opted not to enlighten them.

Let a Smile be Your Companion

I’m a year late to the party but I’m so glad that not only has the Most Mysterious Song on the Internet been identified, but the guys responsible – FEX – are all still around and able to appreciate the love people have been directing at their work for the last 17 years.

For once it’s an internet fairy tale with a happy ending!

Kind of chilling to think that Darius S. probably captured the only ever time it was played on the radio (likely September 17th 1984) and without that such a fantastic song would have never been remembered at all!