SciFiGamers, My Part in Their Downfall

You know, it’s great when you see your kids grow up and achieve something in the outside world.

About a year ago someone decided that the way to get ahead in life would be to set up a Tumblr blog that harvested images and posts from the Warhammer Subreddit and presented them as their own with no credit or attribution. This was eventually noticed by the admins, and said blog was deluged with DMCA takedown requests until Tumblr had no choice but to shut it down with extreme prejudice. Hooray!

Before this happened however, I made a suggestion in the thread discussing the issue, that we should all add “SciFiGamers Sucks Ass” to our posts, in the hope that the bot behind the theft would slavishly copy such comments across. A few people attempted this, posting messages much more explicit, but the blog was shut down shortly afterwards and nothing much came of it.

A few months later the same blog popped up again under a slightly different URL. I made my suggestion again, this time providing “SCIFIGAMERS GARGLES DONKEY KNOB” as a sample message. The idea took off like wildfire and before very long the thread and the parasite blog were decorated with messages such as “Here are my Imperial Knights. By the way, SciFiGamers ingests it’s own feces!”. Once again the blog was taken down shortly afterwards. Victory!

Earlier today it was discovered that another site was parasiting off the Subreddit. The Mods made my humble idea official policy, and before long the infringing site was bulging at the seams with absolutely awful – and often hilarious – messages condoning all manner of perversions and extreme political views. Before long the actual owner of the site showed up in the Subreddit and apologised, having taken down all of the pirated content. However it was then discovered that the original offenders were at it again, so the bile cannon was redirected their way. As I type this, SciFiGamers are overwhelmed with crude and offensive messages, and the campaign has made it to the front page of Reddit.

I’m so proud! ;D

The Seven Wonders of the Second World War

1: The HMS Habakkuk (UK/Canada)
2: His Majesty’s Artillery Barrages, Brixton and Leyton (UK)
3: The USS George Washington and USS Theodore Roosevelt Invasion Carriers (USA)
4: The Mukhoboyka Sonic Anti-Aircraft Array (USSR)
5: The Landkreuzer P. 1400 Ratte II Super Tank (Germany)
6: The Silberadler Intercontinental Bomber (Germany)
7: The Mount Takao Grand Imperial Bunker Complex (Japan)

Foretold

Got a lot of stuff going on at work at the moment which is sending my anxiety levels higher than Ozzy Osbourne at the Alamo, thus not a lot has been happening here at the Wyrmlog as I’m generally finding myself with only enough energy to play Minecraft, listlessly surf the web, troll people on Reddit and sleep.

But I thought I’d pop up briefly to say how much I enjoyed Mummy on the Orient Express. I honestly think it’s the best episode since Capaldi took over. I’ve been a bit uncertain of him as the Doctor – I like him, and he’s certainly been trying hard but it wasn’t until The Caretaker that I felt that he started to fit into the character – a delay that I’m pretty sure is down to a combination of scripts and direction more than any intrinsic unsuitability for the role. But last night he was every bit the Doctor, and the story was a cracker as well.

Also, well, it shames me slightly to admit this – the modern sensitive man that I so obviously am – but that dress! I’ve never found Jenna Coleman any more or less attractive than any other pretty young woman, but that flapper outfit – wowee I believe is the word.

OK, that’s more enough of that I think we can all agree.

That sure told me!

So the other day I happened to check out the trailer for the US reality show Utopia, in which a carefully selected group of academics, scientists and engineers is put into a isolated compound for a year to construct a new society. Oh, sorry, I got that wrong,  a carefully selected bunch of fanatics, weirdos and freaks are put into a compound for a year so we can cheer at them fighting each other. Good wholesome entertainment!

Anyway, I was watching the trailer and they cut to the narrator who was a natty looking chap in a waistcoat, hat, thick rimmed glasses and moustache. “Who’s he think he is?” I laughed to myself “Dan Piraro?“.

A subtitle came up on the screen – Dan Piraro.

Well, that sure told me!

Eater of Pumpkins

So I was all ready to write up a humorous screed this morning about how Peter Peter Pumpkin Eater is clearly a story about a man who murders his wife and that we shouldn’t be reading such things to children, when I discovered that it actually is.

Older variations of the rhyme feature men who shove their unwanted wives up chimneys, or let mice eat them to death. Shoving her into a pumpkin is almost tame by comparison.

Honestly, with all this scholarship it’s getting so you can’t make a simple joke about folklore anymore!

The Court of Ancient Grievances

Order! Order! The Court of Ancient Grievances is now in session!

It is hereby alleged that on or around the 9th of October 1998 the music reviewers of the Sunday Times newspaper stated that the song Thunderbirds are Coming Out by TISM contained “speculation about the sexual proclivities of the Thunderbirds puppets”, indicating that said reviewers had either not listened to the song, or when listening to the song did not pay even cursory attention to the lyrics.

It is furthermore alleged that on or around the 26th of February 2001 the music reviewers of the Sunday Times newspaper stated in relation to the song Heat Seeking Pleasure Machine by Paul Mac that “Paul Mac has a sexy voice”, indicating that said reviewers did not carry out any research or even bother to read the back of the CD case – both actions that would have uncovered the publicly available fact that the vocalist on said song was Tex Perkins of the Cruel Sea.

It is also alleged that on or around the 12th of June 2002 the music reviewers of the Sunday Times newspaper stated that the song Satisfaction by Benny Benassi was a cover of the Rolling Stones song (I Can’t Get No) Satisfaction, indicating that said reviewers either failed to listen to the Benny Benassi song, failed to listen to the Rolling Stones song, or equally likely failed to listen to either.

Therefore, it is the opinion of this court that the music reviewers of the Sunday Times between the years 1998 and 2002 were a bunch of complete fart-artists labouring under the weight of a total and systemic contempt for music, the music listening public and their responsibilities as employees of the Sunday Times.

How plead the defendants?

(Note: The Court of Ancient Grievances acknowledges that this all happened a long time ago, and that it might in fact have been the music reviewers of the West Australian Newspaper who carried out these crimes against fact. If so, the Court apologises unreservedly to the music reviewers of the Sunday Times who presumably did not have their heads completely up their arses.)

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