My PC died this morning 🙁
While it’s in the shop I’ll have limited access to email and (far worse) the net. If I survive I’ll announce my return to online existence in a blogpost.
Wish me luck.
Disaster
Cruelly ripped from the digital teat.
Month: November 2011
Day of the Lepus
I’ve started doing some serious planning for my trip to the east early next year – figuring out what I’m going to see and when I’m going to see it and so forth. As I’m a 21st century digital boy this has included a lot of poking around on Google Earth, and in doing so I’ve stumbled over something somewhat entertaining.
Have a look at this street on Middle Head. A typical suburban scene you might think, but what’s that by the fence on the left? Maybe if we move in closer…
Ha! There it goes!
Right into the bushes!
As I said, entertaining 🙂
That’s all I’ve got to say.
The Worldwide Leman Russ Bitz Shortage
Someone doesn’t want me having a Eradicator…
So, a while back I placed an order on eBay for some Warhammer 40k bitz – including two Leman Russ turrets – from a seller that I’ve dealt with many times before without problems.
My order arrived a few weeks later – minus one of the turrets.
I emailed the seller politely asking where the second turret was, and they apologised profusely, saying they’d send it immediately.
Not long after the first order I placed an order with another seller (again whom with I’ve happily dealt in the past) that included a Leman Russ Nova Cannon. My order arrived a few weeks later, sans cannon.
I emailed the seller to point this out, and they apologised profusely, immediately refunding the cost of the cannon.
Today a parcel arrived from the first seller. It contained five 40mm bases that I never ordered, and no Leman Russ turret.
Call me paranoid but this is getting suspicious…
11/11/11
It occurred to me late last night that Plastic Bertrand’s Ca Plane Pour Moi and Sigue Sigue Sputnik’s Love Missile F1-11 share the same beat and chord progression (or at least the same something, I’m no musician…). This means that you could make an awesome mashup!
Think about it!
US bombs cruising overhead!
There’s goes my love rocket red!
Multi-millions still unfed!
Psycho maniac interbred!
(Wooo-oo-oo-ooo!)
Now shoot it up!
Shoot it up!
Shoot it up!
Shoot it up up up up up up!
Now shoot it up!
(Wooo-oo-oo-ooo!)
Shoot it up!
Yeah, I’ll shut up now 🙂
PS: Boo yah! Plain Packaging legislation has passed. Take that Tobacco industry!
I was an 11 Year Old Idiot
Hundreds of people were killed and many more are dying of cancer.
Back in 1986 it was my primary school’s 50th anniversary. To celebrate this event, all the students wrote an essay to be placed in a time capsule to be opened on the 75th anniversary.
Which was last Sunday.
So, I got to read a letter from my 11 year old self – turns out, I was an idiot! ;D
TIME CAPSULE 1986
Hi, my name is [REDACTED]. Im 11 years old and I have blond hair lots of frecles big feet. Im the 3rd smallest in the class (Belinda [unreadable] the smallest) and I collect stamps, soft toys, chip bukets, rocks and budgie feathers I have 4 pets two fish one bird and a dog.
This year is the Internationale Year of Peace (1 singn for the international year of peace) And Pope John Paul the second is coming to Pperth. Hes having a big mass on the thirtyieth of november, Im going.
Earlier this year we could see Hallys comet and at 1oclock in the morning we got up to see it (0100 Hours on the 24 hour clock) it looks like picture two.
This year the space shuttle columbia blew up (3) and so did the cherbonal nuclear reactor (4). Hundreds of people were killed and many more are dying of cancer.
I think In 2011 I think (in School) everyone will have a computer and the teachers will be humanoids. You do all your work on your a computer and it gets printed out on the printer. For sport you turn your computer to remot control and move the ball by it. Everyone has a chemistry set and constant chemical supplies and you can learn how to make a micro chip.
flife would be fun.
What’d I tell you? An idiot. Although at least I was correct about the teachers being humanoids 😀
The various numbers were supposed to reference a sheet full of hand drawn pictures, but I ruined my first try and didn’t get a new one done in time. That’s always kind of weighed on my mind – perhaps I should draw one now and take it up to the school as a replacement…
Slip of the Keys
Ohhhhhhhhhhhh crap…
Thanks to a simple typing error I just bid $450 for a handful of plastic 40k gubbins on eBay.
I cannot see how this could end well…
Inevitable
If you play Warhammer 40k, it’s inevitable that sooner or later Games Workshop will completely screw you over.
In my case this happened a few months back. I’d figured out a strategy that I reckoned would – if not actually defeat Fabes and his Spess Mehreens at least give them a run for their money. I even spent some money purchasing models to do it all proper and official like. Then Games Workshop changed the rules and invalidated the entire thing.
Dang.
(I’m not going to say what the strategy was as I’m sure Fabes would be interested in playing a game using it just to see what would have happened…)
And this month Games Workshop have done it again with the release of the new Necrons Codex.
Of course they haven’t screwed me over games-wise – I’m an IG Treadhead not a Necronphile. They’ve instead completely offended my stylistic sensibilities by changing the Necrons from a ruthless, emotionless killing machine serving the omnicidal agenda of millenia-dead star gods into a bunch of bickering empire builders who no longer want to harvest the galaxy, just rule it with a living-metal fist. The latest White Dwarf even features a conversation between a couple of Necrons. A fething conversation!
And the C’Tan! Now it turns out that the Necrons overthrew the C’Tan and split them into “shards”. Shards? What pantheon are we talking about here?
The Necrons used to represent an important aspect of the grimdarkness of the 40k universe – make deals with things more powerful that yourself and you’ll lose everything. Now you can apparently make deals with things more powerful than yourself, overthrow them, and walk away with cool metal bodies covered in bling. That’s not 40k. That’s not even close to 40k. But I suppose it does mean Games Workshop can sell a bunch more cool looking models, which is the main thing*.
Oh well, time to invoke the MST3K mantra….
* Yes, of course selling models is the main thing, it’s always been the main thing, and if Games Workshop wants to alter their IP to sell more models they’re perfectly within their rights to do so. It just hurts to have it shoved so obviously in our faces, that’s all.
A Typical Day at the Office
Email from Client: I add da product an it no in da pending! Help me!*
My Reply: Just to make sure I’ve got this straight – you added a product using the the new interface, but it became active immediately rather than going into the pending category? Correct?
Client’s Reply: I no see product not anywhere!
Reply I would have liked to send: I asked you a damn question!! If you don’t answer it I can’t fix your petty little problem!
What I actually did: Spent twenty minutes investigating the database and determining that the product had been added using the old interface, and the client skipped a step, despite being given clear, numbered instructions only yesterday.
Sheeze!
* The client’s emails were actually written in reasonable English, I just edited them to cave man to give an idea of how uninformative and useless they were.
My Dark Mistress
That sweet, syrupy taste.
Good Lord! This is the Wyrmlog’s 1000th post!
Cecil! Get the champagne!
It came to my attention over the weekend that I appear to have addicted myself to Coke Zero.
Yes, laugh if you must. Make comments about how I’m completely exaggerating my situation and how what I actually mean is that I just like the stuff, and I’m being dramatic. But no. I’m dead serious. I think I’ve become an addict.
You see, the thing that you’re probably forgetting is that Coke Zero contains caffeine, and caffeine is a dependency forming stimulant. If I wanted to be more scientifically accurate I should probably say that I’ve become a caffeine addict, but the thing about caffeine addiction is that the addict develops a psychological association between the high from the caffeine and the delivery method. The addict doesn’t actually crave caffeine, they crave whatever it is that contains the caffeine.
In my case, Coke Zero.
I’ve never consumed that much caffeine. When I get to work in the morning I grab a caffeine containing drink to give me a boost and help me face the horrors of eight hours of PHP coding and fielding phone calls from idiots who wouldn’t know an SMTP server if it bit them in the rear. Historically I’ve consumed sugar-free Red Bull, but the supply of it at the eccentric supermarket over the road has been erratic for the last year or so, so I’ve been substituting Coke Zero instead. And I’ve developed quite a taste for it.
But there’s a difference between having a taste for something, and being addicted. So what was the moment I knew I had a problem? On Saturday afternoon I was sitting at my computer and feeling thirsty. “Hmmm” I thought, “A Coke Zero would be really nice about now” so I got up, went out, walked over to the shops and bought a two litre bottle, carried it home and had a drink. Then I felt like another drink… Half an hour later the bottle was empty, and I still felt like a Coke Zero. Derp.
Following on from this revelation I’ve been looking back over the last few months and realised that I’ve been preferentially selecting Coke Zero when other, healthier drinks are available. I’ve also been drinking it in the evenings when I know I should avoid caffeine in order to have a decent night’s sleep. Whoops.
So, what am I going to do about this? Not a great deal. Caffeine is a pretty harmless drug, I mean it’s not like I’m hooked on heroin or something. I’m going to source a decent supply of sugar-free Red Bull to break the cycle, not drink caffeine on the weekends unless I’m doing something really active, and not drink it at all after 4:00pm. That should see me straight.
Probably 🙂
A Challenge Unmatched
Apparently there’s some horse race or something on today? I dunno.
Anyway, as none of my noble readers have been able to solve the conundrum I posted last week, I thought I’d post up the solution. I’m keeping the donkey for myself! So, the original text, untranslated to modern English…
I have of late,—but wherefore I know not,—lost all my mirth, forgone all custom of exercises; and indeed, it goes so heavily with my disposition that this goodly frame, the earth, seems to me a sterile promontory; this most excellent canopy, the air, look you, this brave o’erhanging firmament, this majestical roof fretted with golden fire,—why, it appears no other thing to me than a foul and pestilent congregation of vapours.
What a piece of work is man! How noble in reason! How infinite in faculties! In form and moving, how express and admirable! In action how like an angel! In apprehension, how like a god! The beauty of the world! The paragon of animals! And yet, to me, what is this quintessence of dust?
It’s Shakespeare! Hamlet to be precise, one of the most famous soliloquies from that most famous of plays. Really, your classical educations are shocking 😉
