It does not matter which way you vote. Either way your planet is Doomed! DOOOOOMED!!

You know, it’s pretty much impossible for me to put into words how much I enjoy spam emails like this…

The massive downfall that will wipe out 49 out of 50 American states… If you didn’t watch this INCENDIARY broadcast yet, then it will take you by complete surprise. And unfortunately you won’t make it out alive, because what’s coming has the devil sign on it. And it was predicted in the BIBLE! Before the church managed to HIDE the tormenting prophecy. But 14 days ago this leaked video went viral, exposing how Obama and the unofficial church leaders fought long WARS to keep this information hidden. Until it was too late for anyone to do anything about it. This is the 18th link they put up in 14 days, and most definitely this site will be taken down again shortly. Watch this shocking video now This is an email advertisement that was sent to you by End Days Survival. If you wish to no longer receive messages, please click here to unsubscribe or write us at 44 main street, Douglas, South Lanarkshire, U.K.

Sure, they’re just trying to sell you food packs, or gold, or trying to get you to visit a site loaded down with viruses, but it’s so damn entertaining!

Questions from my Toilet Paper

1: What is the best way to identify a frog species?
Stop it at the border and demand its papers

2: Some frogs can change the colour of their skin, why would they do this?
To keep up with the latest fashions

3: What is the biggest threat to our frogs?
Frog eating aliens from Tau Capricorni

4: True of False? Frogs can leap higher than a house.
True, for a sufficiently small house and a sufficiently large frog.

TP, why you question me?
TP, why you question me?

Shopping

You know those dreams where there’s a really awesome shop, and then you wake up and forget the dream, but halfway through the day you remember the really awesome shop and for a moment you think it’s real and then you remember it was just a dream and there’s no really awesome shop?

I hate those dreams.

But I tell ya, if Games Workshop branches were as amazing as I dream they are, there’d be a lot less whinging in the tabletop community.

(I dream about Games Workshop. It’s hard to put into words just how sad that is).

Sean Bean probably won’t die

It’s always a gamble when one of your favourite books gets turned into a movie. Even more so when said movie stars Matt Damon. But the trailer for *The Martian* actually looks pretty good.

I can already spot a few things they’ve done differently, but I think I can see why, so that’s cool. And it’s at least one movie in which Sean Bean is unlikely to die (no guarantees though…).

What is this I don’t even…

A client is having problems importing data from Excel into one of our systems. They’ve provided (after much prodding) a sample file so I’ve asked them for details on exactly how they’re trying to import it – what options they select, etc. Today I got the following response…

“Yes, this is the one of the way to import file (not direct way), just copy and paste to suit Excel import format column, then import it.”

Even if that was written in comprehensible English I suspect it would not answer my question.