Hmmmm. No sooner do I finish my Morlock inspired ravings on Saturday, than I discoverthe unfortunate fact that the PAX TV series Mysterious Ways hasn’t been renewedfor a third season. Now this in itself is no great tragedy, it wasn’t after all the bestshow I’ve ever seen. In fact in parts (often fairly large parts) it was pretty bloody awful,which is only to be expected I suppose in show that’s simultaneously attempting to tap intothe audiences of The X-Files and Touched by an Angel. However it’sdemise does lead to one unfortunate consequence, namely that (short of some theoreticalfuture late night repeats) I will no longer be able to get my recommended weekly dosageof Alisen Down. Or her character, Miranda, who (if she were real*) would in allprobability be my soul mate†. So I’m not in the best possible mood.
On the other hand, I am smelling particularly manly today, which can only be a good thing.For many, many years I have used pump deodorants out of concern for theplanet‡. However for Christmas I received a deodorant/body gel pack from oneof those people who don’t know you well enough to get you any meaningful kind ofpresent, but apparently do know you well enough to buy you intimate hygieneproducts.
So it happened one day that I ran out of pump deodorant, and (because well youneed deodorant) I gave it a try. Much to my surprise it worked far moreeffectively, and didn’t smell like mashed up animal glands§. So, after muchdeliberation, I finally sold out. On Saturday, among many other household purchases, Ibought a fairly well known brand of manly spray on deodorant. Hence my particularlymasculine smell.
In the deranged fastnesses of my mind at least part of my psyche is convinced thatthis change of deodorant will somehow act to turn me into a babe magnet. It seems to beunder the impression that women who have previously refused to give me the time of daywill now fall into my arms saying “I’d never have been interested in a guy like you,but you smell so manly! Take me now!!”. The more rational, realistic part of mypersonality is nowhere near so optimistic 🙂
The fire alarm at the old people’s home next door is going off again. Buncha’ pyros!
* I’m not that delusional. Yet anyway 🙂
† Brilliant, weird, introverted quantum physics grad student who dresses in blackand investigates the paranormal? Yeah like we wouldn’t hit it off 😉
‡ Yeah, yeah, no one uses CFCs anymore. But the hydrocarbons they replacedthem with are a greenhouse gas. Bet they didn’t tell you that little factoid in schooleh?
§ Perhaps you don’t think that’s what male scents are generally made out of.Now who’s being naive?