Dachshund Antibiotics

The title is a pun…

OK, I couldn’t get the code installed to take the Wyrmlog offline in protest over SOPA/PIPA today. Let’s just pretend, OK?

Here’s some info about the issue.

Saw the Doc yesterday and he’s confirmed that I probably have typhus. I’m on some pretty powerful antibiotics (the kind where you can’t go outside because your skin will slough off on exposure to sunlight) that should sort me out in short order.

I hope.

You Can Dance if You Want To

We built this city on Rock and Roll…

Thanks for the concern everyone. I’m feeling a bit better now – mentally if not physically – and can start to think about what went wrong without wanting to curl up and die.

On the physical side I’m sick as a dog, so it’s probably best that I got of the ship when I did – I’d rather be sick as a dog at home than in the middle of the Tasman sea. There’s at least the chance that I’ve caught a mild case of typhus off a tick that attacked my leg, but I’m off to see the doctor today who’ll presumably give me a firm diagnosis and some pills to fix it.

As a final note, if I can pull myself together enough to get the plugin installed I intend to take the Wyrmlog dark tomorrow as part of the worldwide SOPA/PIPA protest. So if you come to visit and there’s nothing here, don’t panic. It’ll all be back to normal soon enough.

On another subject, may I present this?

Oh, ok then, no πŸ˜‰

A Dark Place

So, am I sailing the ocean blue, heading for adventures in New Zealand?

No, I am not. I am sitting in my apartment in Perth wallowing in a nasty combination of embarrassment, humiliation, disappointment, anger and worry about how much money I’ve wasted.

Turns out I hate cruising. After two days on board the boat I felt so wretched that my only option was to jump ship at Melbourne and fly home. So I’m not going to New Zealand, I’m not seeing all the cool stuff I was looking forwards too, and I’m pretty pissed off at the world and myself for not realising that life on a cruise ship would be hellish for an Aspie like myself.

So, I need to cancel all my reservations in New Zealand, alert my bank that I’m back in Perth so they won’t block my card and get in touch with my travel insurance to see if there’s any way I can get any of my money back. I’m not hopeful on that last one, but I’ll try.

I’ve also got to try and reconcile myself to another magnificent failure at living. If American sit-coms are anything to judge by, this is the kind of thing best treated by consuming vast amounts of alcohol and going to a strip club, but that’s not going to happen, so I’ll need to figure something else out. Give me a week or so and I should be coming out of this horrible funk. I hope.

Man I suck.

ATO WTF (FML)

FML

Delay in the processing of your 2011 income tax return

Dear [Purple Wyrm]

We are writing to advise of a delay in the processing of your recently lodged 2011 tax return. Your return will be reviewed as it has been identified as containing some information that we want to further investigate prior to issuing an assessment.

We are using specialist technology to help us identify and review returns that may contain missing and/or incorrect information. Claims outside normal individual or industry ranges will result in all aspects of a person’s tax position being reviewed. Last year 71% of these returns were adjusted prior to the notices of assessment issuing. This resulted in an increase in the amount of tax payable and in many instances a penalty was also imposed.

Some of the common issues identified include:
* understated income and/or fictitious payment summary details
* overstated or fraudulent deductions
* non entitlement to claimed offsets/rebate
* instances of identity takeover.

What we will do
We have a responsibility to the government and the community to ensure that everyone pays the correct amount of tax under the law. We will be undertaking further investigations and will compare the information in your return with data supplied by other parties, such as employers.

We anticipate your return is likely to be delayed for a minimum of 12 weeks while we conduct our investigations. We will hold your 2011 return until are investigations are finalised.

What happens next
If during the course of these investigations we are able to cross reference information you have reported in your tax return with information provided by other parties, we will issue your notice of assessment without the need to contact you further.

If we require further information to verify particular details within your return we will contact you and request it. If you have claimed work-related expenses exceeding $300 in total then you should ensure you have the written evidence available in case it is requested.

Credit interest is payable by the Australian Tax Office (ATO) in certain circumstances. If you are due a refund you may be entitled to an amount of credit interest as a result of the delay in issuing your notice of assessment. Where applicable we will automatically calculate and credit your account with the interest amount payable.

For more information
If you are expecting a refund and experiencing serious financial hardship we may be able to arrange for your return to be processed as a priority. Visit www.ato.gov.au and search for ‘hardship’.

If you then have any further questions please phone 13 28 61 between 8:00am and 6:00pm, Monday to Friday.

If you need assistance in languages other than English please phone the Translating and Interpreting Service on 13 14 50.

What if you need to phone us
We need to know we are talking to the right person before we can discuss your tax affairs. We will ask for details only you or someone you have authorised would know. An authorised person is osmeone who you have previously told us can act on your behalf. If you can, please have your tax file number (TFN) with you.

Yours sincerely

[Some ATO Pleb]

 

What the hell?!? What in the name of all that’s sane and holy would trigger the ATO to ‘investigate’ my tax return claim?!? I haven’t done anything the slightest bit different to the last ten claims I’ve put in and yet suddenly I’m under suspicion of tax fraud???

Not only does this mean that I won’t get my return in time for my holiday (which I was really hoping for) but the entire trip will have a cloud over it – not knowing if I’m going to be raided by the AFP or something on my return. Great. Thanks for that ATO.

(Need I add that I have never attempted to defraud the tax system in my life? I mean, sure, that’s exactly what someone who has attempted to defraud the tax system would say, but it’s still the truth.)

*Sigh*

Later: I just called the ATO to try and find out what’s going on and advise them I’ll be out of the country for a few weeks of their “investigation”, and it turns out they’re all on holidays until next week. Our tax dollars at work!

International/Intestinal Instability

Had a great time catching up with the guys at Trigg Beach on Saturday (photos are up on my Flickr stream). I ended up taking home a fair bit of leftover food, and ate some of it yesterday, which probably has something to do with me waking up this morning with a case of either food poisoning or gastroenteritis. Not fun, but after drugging myself up and sleeping until 4:00 I’m feeling somewhat more human. Somewhat.

In other news Kim Jong Il is dead. Hold on to your hats everyone, this is likely to be a bumpy ride…

Good News in the Trouser Department

Testicular microlithiasis for the win!

Well, I am pleased to report that – after numerous medical tests – it turns out that I don’t have testicular cancer.

Not only would it have put a serious cramp in my style (and, you know, possibly killed me) but it would have completely ruined my upcoming holiday.

On the downside I now have no excuse to join a Fight Club πŸ˜‰

The Importance of Data

I’m not who you think I am.

You know, I’m not as smart as people think I am.

I mean, yeah, I’m smart. I can say without too much unjustified arrogance that I’m a lot smarter than the average Joe on the street. But the thing is I come off as being far smarter than I actually am, because I have a vast amount of readily available data to draw on.

I’m knowledgeable. I’m really knowledgeable. This is one of the advantages that having a differently structured brain gives you. Sure, an autistic brain is retarded (I use the phrase in it’s literal sense of ‘held back’, so don’t be getting all up in my grill ‘kay?) socially, but it’s fantastic at storing and quickly retrieving ridiculous amounts of information. I absorb information like a sponge, and can usually pull it up for processing with a moment’s notice. Combine this with a merely higher than average IQ and it comes out looking positively phenomenal.

Trust me, I’m not really as smart as you think. Look at maths for instance. I can’t do maths in my head at all, I just don’t have the working memory for it. Give me a pen and pad to act as an external buffer and I can crunch numbers until the cows come home, but ask me to add two three digit numbers in my head (what’s 528 plus 234?), and I really struggle – I just can’t hold all the number combinations in my brain at the same time.

And time. I have very little sense of time. I caught up with Fabes over the weekend and he pointed out that it’s been six months since we last spoke. I would guessed it was one and a half, maybe two months tops. That’s just stupid πŸ™‚

So yeah, don’t overestimate my intelligence folks. I don’t have a terribly fast processor, and very limited RAM – my fast System Bus and massive hard drive just make it seem like I do πŸ™‚

The Worldwide Leman Russ Bitz Shortage

Someone doesn’t want me having a Eradicator…

So, a while back I placed an order on eBay for some Warhammer 40k bitz – including two Leman Russ turrets – from a seller that I’ve dealt with many times before without problems.

My order arrived a few weeks later – minus one of the turrets.

I emailed the seller politely asking where the second turret was, and they apologised profusely, saying they’d send it immediately.

Not long after the first order I placed an order with another seller (again whom with I’ve happily dealt in the past) that included a Leman Russ Nova Cannon. My order arrived a few weeks later, sans cannon.

I emailed the seller to point this out, and they apologised profusely, immediately refunding the cost of the cannon.

Today a parcel arrived from the first seller. It contained five 40mm bases that I never ordered, and no Leman Russ turret.

Call me paranoid but this is getting suspicious…

I was an 11 Year Old Idiot

Hundreds of people were killed and many more are dying of cancer.

Insightful analysis of the Cherbonal Disaster...
Insightful analysis of the Cherbonal Disaster...

Back in 1986 it was my primary school’s 50th anniversary.Β  To celebrate this event, all the students wrote an essay to be placed in a time capsule to be opened on the 75th anniversary.

Which was last Sunday.

So, I got to read a letter from my 11 year old self – turns out, I was an idiot! ;D

TIME CAPSULE 1986

Hi, my name is [REDACTED]. Im 11 years old and I have blond hair lots of frecles big feet. Im the 3rd smallest in the class (Belinda [unreadable] the smallest) and I collect stamps, soft toys, chip bukets, rocks and budgie feathers I have 4 pets two fish one bird and a dog.

This year is the Internationale Year of Peace (1 singn for the international year of peace) And Pope John Paul the second is coming to Pperth. Hes having a big mass on the thirtyieth of november, Im going.

Earlier this year we could see Hallys comet and at 1oclock in the morning we got up to see it (0100 Hours on the 24 hour clock) it looks like picture two.

This year the space shuttle columbia blew up (3) and so did the cherbonal nuclear reactor (4). Hundreds of people were killed and many more are dying of cancer.

Humanoids!
Humanoids!

I think In 2011 I think (in School) everyone will have a computer and the teachers will be humanoids. You do all your work on your a computer and it gets printed out on the printer. For sport you turn your computer to remot control and move the ball by it. Everyone has a chemistry set and constant chemical supplies and you can learn how to make a micro chip.

flife would be fun.

What’d I tell you? An idiot. Although at least I was correct about the teachers being humanoids πŸ˜€

The various numbers were supposed to reference a sheet full of hand drawn pictures, but I ruined my first try and didn’t get a new one done in time. That’s always kind of weighed on my mind – perhaps I should draw one now and take it up to the school as a replacement…

Close Bitnami banner
Bitnami