Everyday Formula

A Superb Owl, by Sylvia Alexander

Got myself banned from Reddit for three days for speculating that if Elon Musk attempted to do to Australia what he’s doing to the United States he’d be shot. This is apparently ‘threatening violence’ despite no mention of any person – let alone myself – actually carrying out the wholey theoretical shooting.

Anyway, the ban has expired and I have full access again, just in time for the site to be flooded with Superbowl and Valentines posts. I CARE NOT FOR YOUR SPORTS OR ROMANCE FESTIVALS, AMERICA! LEAVE ME ALONE!

I am now also startlingly poor after some embarrassingly unwise dipping into my savings account. As such I am organising a fire sale of various things I have been putting aside for years with the intention of selling them. I am also halting my program of generously bagging up my used cans and bottles and leaving them by the bins for the less fortunate – I’m less fortunate now, and will be reclaiming every cent I can as soon as I figure out how to haul them to a recycling centre. I’m also going to prune my library as there are many books in my collection that – while nice to have – I do not need to re-read or reference. Second hand books don’t sell for a lot, but the last time I counted I had well over 1,000 volumes knocking around the place, so that’s got to add up to a bit of pocket money.

I have made a vague new-years resolution to get all my Warhammer 40k tanks assembled and painted before buying any new ones. This is going quite well so far, although I am starting to run low on spray paint. Buying more may have to wait a while in line with my new austerity measures. I’m very happy with how my kitbashed Banewolf is looking – all going well I’ll shortly be able to show off all three Geneva-Convention violating variants of the Hellhound flame tank. Nothing like bathing the enemies of the Emperor in a high pressure shower of molten Uranium Hexafluoride – that’ll learn ’em!

Had a games day over the weekend with Chae, Liz, Paula, and Paula’s new beau Mark. Very enjoyable, although the heat was a bit oppressive. Liz managed to roll nine 6s in a row, which Google assures me is a 1 in 217,678,233,600 chance, which is rather impressive really. Prep for the games day also saw me break out my brand new knock-off Henry Hoover – it’s amazing how clean you can get your carpets when you have a vacuum that actually works.

To finish off, here is Henry Hoover predicting the pandemic…

AI = Anti Iesus!!!

The current wave of AI is a mixed bag at best, but I wouldn’t go as far as to call it the Antichrist. Not the nutty, American, Christian spammers though! They have it all worked out!

Yes If you look closely in the Bible, there are very specific warnings of the rise of AI Revelation 13 talks of the emergence of the Anti-Christ, a great deceiver that will rise in times of great chaos and confusion And, right now, AI’s influence is rapidly spreading around the world in disguise. Sadly, most people are blissfully unaware. See here why: [URL REDACTED] Or perhaps already corrupted by its “touch.” Even more alarmingly, AI is getting more and more powerful Chat GPT 4, a version of Microsoft’s AI, was opened to the public in March 2023 It is reported to contain 10 times the knowledge base of Chat GPT 3… And have 100 Billion times more processing power. What comes next? American Christians have made a short documentary to help you understand and prepare for the dangers of AI. If you truly believe in God, and his biblical prophecies, I urge you to watch the video now. Because Big Tech could take it down at any moment. Click here to watch it right now: [URL REDACTED]

The truth of course is that Big Tech would never take down their crazy documentaries – they’d just feed them to their AIs to help them produce even crazier documentaries with no human input at all!

Nectar of Mammoth

I never thought I’d have to add “wild mammoths” to the spam filter…

Did you know our ancestors enjoyed normal pressure? That’s right. They chased wild mammoths and lived in caves. But they had healthy hearts and had no strokes. And modern scientists from the University of Virginia just discovered why. It’s all because they had a “signaling molecule” in their tiny kidney cells that we don’t have. But the good news is — there’s an easy way to restore your kidneys’ “signaling molecule” by using something called ‘Nectar of Gods’. That’s because the ‘nectar of gods’ is proven by modern science to help get your blood pressure normal again. ⇒ Nectar of Gods restores normal blood pressure

Oh Carpathia!

The Carpathian Valleys are a consonant corner of our planet that occasional distinguish about. Here, amidst heavy forests and mountain peaks, untruth not exclusively sublime natural landscapes but also mystical stories that are worth sharing. My blog, hosted at [no, you may not have a link you spammer!], invites you to outing into this fictitious place. I am your pilot and storyteller, and I flatten in friendship with the Carpathians at premier sight. Together, we liking examine the occult gems of this preternatural mountain run, from venerable castles and fairytale villages to secluded waterfalls and places where legerdemain and authenticity blend together. In my blog, you thinks fitting find: Fascinating Stories: Give each jaunt, every engage, and every dare that adds a unsurpassed character to these places. Inspiring Photographs: Images capturing the splendor of variety and the cultural legacy of the Carpathians. Useful Tips: Recommendations on how to plan your own make to these places, including the best routes, alteration options, and culinary delights. Don`t miss the chance to on on an exciting undertaking with me. Subscribe to my blog and pick up close to seeking unforgettable travels at the end of one`s tether with the Carpathian Valleys!

I am quite impressed that not only does this spammer offer jaunts to a ‘fictitious’ place, but that said place blends together both authenticity and legerdemain. Occult gems indeed!

Booragoon Boys

The following message was submitted through the contact form of an accountancy firm that happens to be one of our clients…

Sick cunt sick cunt looking for a figggght. Two options, suckit lickit. Booragoon boys already back in towwwwn. ECEM

I can’t decide if this is utterly appalling or the funniest thing I’ve seen all week.

Monkeyshines: Now with Chap Service!

You gotta love spam emails that use text spinning…

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